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The Bad Puns Thread


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Title says it all. Anyways, I'll start us off with a horrible one.

 

Which U.S. president was the least guilty?

 

 

 

Lincoln.

225px-US_One_Cent_Obv.png

 

Because he was in a cent.

 

 

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Hmmm I'm terrible @ puns. My friend Wale is great at them!

 

Well a hairy legs club is being started online for women who feel they shouldn't have to shave their legs.

 

To criticize their stance can get a little hairy. :-)

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Awwwww. That's sad. Speaking of sad my friend Wale is moving away to Cleveland... We had a going away party today. He didn't do any puns because we were all crying... :(

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Here're a few more awful puns, then, to cheer you up! ^_^

 

What do you get when the Pope takes a dump?

 

Holy crap!

 

 

What did the buffalo say when his son left for college?

 

"Bison."

 

 

What do you call a blind fruit?

 

Vision impeared.

 

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I knew I was staying away from this thread for a reason. :) Groan, indeed!

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I knew I was staying away from this thread for a reason. :) Groan, indeed!

 

I guess you don't find these puns very punny at all.

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Okay, you asked for it ....... :blink:

  • I once heard a joke about amnesia, but I forgot how it goes.
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  • It is tough to do inventories in Afghanistan because of the tally ban.
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  • Why did the capacitor kiss the diode? He just couldn't resistor.
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  • I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
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The game is on, then! :P

 

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him...

 

 

super callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

 

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I think I just lost 5% of my brain capacity.

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Alright, I thought'a this one while down in Florida. :P

 

What do you call confident houses with security systems?

 

 

Sure locked homes.

 

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Aghgghgh, I'm in pain! Why do I torture myself by visiting this thread!!!!!

 

Q: What is unpleasant about being drunk?

A: Ask a glass of water.

 

(apologies to Douglas Adams....)

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