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T.o.b.y

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T.o.b.y last won the day on May 15

T.o.b.y had the most liked content!

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About T.o.b.y

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    Consulting Detective

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  • Gender
    Female
  • Interests
    Books, laughter, escapism in all its varieties...
  • Favorite series 1 episode
    The Great Game
  • Favourite Series 2 Episode
    The Reichenbach Fall
  • Favourite Series 3 Episode
    The Sign of Three
  • Favourite series 4 episode
    The Lying Detective

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  1. That's mostly my worldview as well (even though I am currently obsessed with a Muscial which mocks this very notion, namely Heathers...) but still, not sending hateful messages is always an option, no matter how hard your life is. Or, to quote another musical: "I was given bad choices, sure, but I could have said no!"
  2. I still wonder what goes on in the minds of the people writing those messages. Probably nothing... Because like Sherlock said: people are idiots.
  3. Sounds like a solid strategy! I wouldn't say nothing toxic ever happens at all... We've had difficulties here and there. But not on the level you describe for sure. By internet standards, this is indeed a very relaxed place imo. 😄
  4. What do I think of this? It's absolutely horrible and there is no excuse at all for that kind of behavior, online or offline. It's one thing if a person really believes, because of their religion, that we are facing eternal damnation and it's their god-given job to save us. Okay, fine, thanks for your concern, I do not share your beliefs, moving on. But insults and harassment are totally unacceptable. It's a mystery to me what people get out of that either. Sending the hateful messages, I mean. How does it help them in any way...? Like Caya said, I am pretty hopeful that nothing like that will happen to you here but if it should, contact a mod and we'll take care of it, ok?
  5. Yeah, but I am worried that those germs get spread around... Adult Teenagerbrain touches their mask and then the food that I buy, the door I need to open, etc. I am usually not paranoid about germs at all (hey, I work with them so to speak). But I do think that's kind of icky.
  6. Honestly, I sometimes wish that people who really, really don't want to wear a mask didn't have to. Before you write me off a crazy, hear me out: over the last few months, I have seen so many variations on "how to turn your face mask into a biohazard" that I seriously think it would be safer to just let certain people go without. And often, I get the impression that it's not even ignorance so much as spite. "You're forcing me to wear this thing? Fine, I'll keep it in my a** pocket for weeks on end, never wash / replace it, if it's disposable I will not dispose of it until it's totally disintegrated. I will also constantly fiddle with it, pull it up and down, take it on and off and never wash / sanitize my hands after contact with the thing. Most of the time, I'll let my nose hang out anyway. You happy now? Huh, huh, HUH?!???"
  7. It's actually not painful at all! I hardly notice my mask any more unless my nose itches or something.
  8. Hey everyone... I thought things were crazy over here when the pandemic began. Turns out sheltered me here in rural Germany doesn't even begin to understand crazy. It's good to hear from you all who keep posting here in spite of everything that's going on. Wish I could help somehow. Wish I could make Sherlock become real and persuade him to go around restoring some balance to the universe. It sure seems to need it.
  9. Well, either when she's off the meds (first attempt to discontinue them will probably be in about a year). Or when we have a vaccine. Or if Germany should by some miracle become new-virus-free sooner. Or if the "immunity after infection" theory were to be proven true and I had a positive antibody test. If there were an emergency that required me to visit her, I would dress up in full protective gear and do it. But otherwise, it's texting, phone and Skype for now. Perhaps when the weather gets warmer, we'll meet outside some time. I think that could work - open space, both wear our masks, keep six feet apart etc. But no hugs...
  10. I think if I didn't have a kid to worry about, I would almost like the pandemic lifestyle... But motherhood aside, there is one aspect that makes me really sad atm: my best friend, the "Sherlock" in my Watson life since childhood, is on immunosuppressants and I work with sick people. So we can't meet at all, even though things are calming down here in Germany and hanging out one on one would otherwise be perfectly legal and reasonably safe atm. But nope. No taking chances here. It's weird, we're both rather solitary and have been perfectly content with only meeting in person once a month or so for years. But now as we're both feeling increasingly burnt out and blue from this whole thing, we're finding ourselves really longing for each other's company. Seriously, I saw that scene from The Lying Detective the other day where Sherlock and John hug and agree that nothing is ok but it is what it is and I almost cried because that's exactly what I want right now and I can't have it.
  11. I my opinion, it sounds like you did the only right thing in that situation. From personal experience and after some thought, my stance on that kind of situation is: people have a right to choose what they want to do with their life, even if that means they choose to get rid of it. They do not, however, have the right to burden me (or anybody else) with that decision. If anyone sends me a halfway believable suicide note, I will call an ambulance, period. If they aren't happy with that then don't send me the note. End of story. Only you can decide whether you can and want to forgive her and if you want to renew the friendship. Maybe make a list of pros and cons?
  12. Awwww. Thanks. And thanks for not saying "well, you shouldn't have had a kid" or "well, you should have had more kids".
  13. Can you teach my son to do that? 😅 I can't work from home but my husband has been trying. Trying... Somehow, we failed to pass on our loner genes. The little man had us draw another boy on the sidewalk with chalk and declared "he can be my brother". Poor kid. At least we found a really sweet babysitter for a while. But she'll have classes again soon.
  14. Depends on their age and abilities... I would have loved it probably and never wanted school to open ever again. Getting an education at my own pace without having to deal with the bullying and drama, meeting only whom I want to occasionally and getting personalized feedback from the teachers online? Yes please! 😂 But I doubt it would have worked for 90% of my classmates. How much (or little) the kids are offered right now varies greatly from school to school. Overall, it doesn't appear to be much... Germany has neglected equipping public schools for the digital age so the options are limited for most. And then there are the really small kids who can't be left to themselves yet. That's a whole other can of worms. Around here, unless you have a really high paying job, a family can't live off of only one income so parents are dependent on daycare or some other form of help to make a living. But daycares are closed atm, grandparents aren't supposed to visit and social distancing has destroyed many other informal support networks. It's a bit of a problem... But as long as we have soccer and the shopping malls open again, everything is apparently juuuuust fiiiine. 🙄
  15. Yeah, the soccer thing makes my blood pressure go through the roof as well. Did you happen to catch that radio interview with this one politician who seriously claimed that it was "too much to ask" of the German people to go without soccer games indefinitely? The same guy didn't want to even discuss re-opening playgrounds, schools or daycares, btw. Or allowing public protests. Interesting priorities... It sounded like, God forbid people get educated and question my decisions. Much better to just have them sit in front of the television watching sports. I really shouldn't complain because keeping your job and steady income these days is a real blessing, but I always feel kind of left out by all these "how to keep yourself busy in quarantine" posts, articles and memes online. Boredom isn't exactly my problem right now.
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