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T.o.b.y last won the day on September 9

T.o.b.y had the most liked content!


About T.o.b.y

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Interests
    Books, laughter, escapism in all its varieties...
  • Favorite series 1 episode
    The Great Game
  • Favourite Series 2 Episode
    The Reichenbach Fall
  • Favourite Series 3 Episode
    The Sign of Three
  • Favourite series 4 episode
    The Lying Detective

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T.o.b.y's Achievements

Consulting Detective

Consulting Detective (8/8)



  1. You never know... I feel guilty sometimes for bringing a child into this world with all its dangers and the dismal prognosis of climate change etc but on the other hand, has it ever been a "good" time to reproduce...? I took a fatalistic approach to it all in the end. Chances were slim enough that even though I'm not religious at all, I told myself well, if it works out I guess it's meant to be. I'm not so worried about how it'll all be for myself long term ("companionship" vs "meal ticket"), more about this little human whom I chose to be responsible for having a decent life and not cursing me for causing his existence. For myself, I have zero regrets already, the past four years have already been worth everything I can imagine. Still, traffic jams and covid rules, sniffles and babysitting can sometimes put a big strain on my nerves...
  2. Me too, my social behavior is entirely performative. I am both an introvert and shy and have learned to mask that over the years. But with Sherlock, it seems more than a necessity. He really does seem to crave attention and an audience. Overall, I see him more as an introvert than an extrovert too though.
  3. Not so much a rant as a whine, but: I got stuck in a traffic jam today on the way to work, had just gotten out of it when my son's daycare called, telling me to pick him up immediately because his mild cold is a violation of their current (and apparently very recently updated) pandemic policy. So I had to drive back while frantically holding 3 cell phone conversations at once with husband, boss and babysitter. Ah, the joys of working motherhood... All of you around here who don't want children, I hope my woes at least serve to make you feel validated... 😅
  4. Hey Kat, interesting question indeed. My intpretation of Mary's appearance in The Lying Detective is that she isn't a ghost at all, rather a figment of John's imagination. He's so upset by her death that a part of him simply refuses to acknowledge she's gone and projects a mental image of her back into his life. Not a hallucination exactly but the fantasy seems to be extremely intense and bordering on pathological. When Sherlock "sees" and talks to her too, I take that to mean he has deduced what's going on with John and simply accepted it in a spirit of "it's ok to not be ok". What does everyone else think?
  5. So maybe that's the reason why I was always a fairly good swimmer...?
  6. That seems so strange to me. But then, I have never really understood obsessing over real people. I go gaga over fictional characters but the actors who play them are only interesting to me in that capacity.
  7. Huh? I don't understand... What kind of argument would a photo of an actor and his wife spark? Are some fans so jealous? Come on, guys (or gals I suppose in this case), even if he were single that wouldn't really change the odds of you getting with him either...
  8. I really was unfamiliar with it and laughing at myself for being clueless. So thank you!
  9. 😄 I always wake up to that music because it's my alarm.
  10. I just took it again out of curiosity too and no surprise really, still came out as INFJ. I notice though that as I get older, my scores become more balanced (with I vs E still being the strongest). I've tried different sources too and always got the same result except once when whatever test it was said INFP instead. Which is nonsense, I'm clearly more J than P. 😄
  11. I know it's formally always plural but at least singular "they" is a halfway practical option in casual conversation that's well enough established to not sound totally strange. I'm not very fussed about "correct" speech; language is fluid and changes all the time. I just don't like long, complicated, artificial sounding phrases that interrupt the flow of a sentence. Would much rather say "they are" even though it's only one person than "he or she or insert diverse pronoun of choice is", which is basically the current approach in German.
  12. I actually wish we had singular "they" in German. It's so convenient when you aren't sure, are talking about an unknown person or trying to generalize. All we have is "he" and "she" and lots of professions have a male and a female name so to sound inclusive, you have to keep saying things like "the actors and actresses", which is long and clunky and complicated, and then someone who identifies as neither still feels left out - and has to either make up their own pronouns which nobody will use or settle for male or female anyway.
  13. I like the sound of that! Nobody uses anything comparable to "sir", "ma'am" or "miss" where I live. It's just last names and "Sie", the formal German "you". Sometimes when people are deliberately trying to be ironic, rude or condescending, they'll say "junge Frau" or "junger Mann" ("young lady" / "young gentleman").
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