GIF Your Mood

[Pseudonym]

He was lucky it was a vegetarian who found him then! 😂

[Carol the Dabbler]

Welcome back, Pseud!!! 

[Carol the Dabbler]

3 hours ago, Pseudonym said:

He was lucky it was a vegetarian who found him then! 😂

Same as the turtles that Alex and I find sunning themselves on the road.  Alex got to one of them just ahead of a fellow who was talking about turtle soup.

[Sherlock The Otter]

This is me today, because I had a messy hair day  It can't be helped, the first day back after a weeks holiday!

x

[Artemis]

 

[Sheerluck]

[Artemis]

Whyyyyy are there so many stupid people.
 

 

[Sheerluck]

5 hours ago, Artemis said:

Whyyyyy are there so many stupid people.
 

 

Ah, the eternal question.

[Carol the Dabbler]

Wanta tell us about it, Artemis?

[Artemis]

On 6/12/2019 at 12:35 PM, Carol the Dabbler said:

Wanta tell us about it, Artemis?

Nah, I don't think I have enough energy for details, and would probably just get me riled again.  But thanks anyway.    The long and short of it is: Stupid people exist, and there are too many of them.

 

[Artemis]

Watching all my neighbors have parties and barbecues:

 

[kimber8ada]

My great niece turned two yesterday but I wasn't invited to her party. Her parents had a big cookout for her last year but wanted to keep it smaller this year--just immediate family and some of her little friends (and their parents). But I'm pretty sure her uncle's girlfriend was there so I'm feeling a bit left out and sorry for myself. She's a sweet thing and I've kept her quite a bit . I have her a gift , just have to figure out when I can give it to her.

[Pseudonym]

I'm sorry Kimber9ada, that sounds tough - can you go around another day or has it made things awkward?

12 hours ago, Artemis said:

Watching all my neighbors have parties and barbecues:

Oh please say you're wearing that hat too 😂

I've spent all day packing and cleaning. I'm off on holiday to Scotland, my dad said he'd come and feed my cats mid-week (I have an automatic cat feeder for the other days), and I said he could stay in my room since I switched my spare room that had a bed in it into an office. But... my room is a tip, since I'm the only one who ever sees it, so I spent the day tidying and cleaning to try to pass as an actual functioning adult. Also packing, we're getting epic level rain here and it's been freezing, so do I pack winter clothes or summer clothes? Hm... mega tired right now, want to go to sleep, but still so much left to do. 

[Arcadia]

A holiday in Scotland sounds like just about what I need right now. Can I slip into your suitcase?

16 hours ago, Artemis said:

Watching all my neighbors have parties and barbecues:

 

Another advantage to living in the woods … I have no idea what my neighbors are doing! I can't see them and they can't see me, yay!

 

[Artemis]

11 hours ago, Arcadia said:

Another advantage to living in the woods … I have no idea what my neighbors are doing! I can't see them and they can't see me, yay!

There must be a lot of space between you and your neighbors.  I can glimpse my neighbors' yards through the trees, and out front.

15 hours ago, Pseudonym said:

Oh please say you're wearing that hat too 😂

I'm about to leap over some lawn games and make off with a hotdog from the neighbor's grill, they smell so good.

15 hours ago, Pseudonym said:

Also packing, we're getting epic level rain here and it's been freezing, so do I pack winter clothes or summer clothes? Hm...

Enjoy your trip!  When I went to Germany I was told to pack for warm spring temps, so I brought mostly t-shirts and a light jacket.  By the time I got there, temps had fallen below freezing and it was snowing.  Since then I always pack at least one item for all kinds of weather.

 

[Artemis]

17 hours ago, kimber8ada said:

My great niece turned two yesterday but I wasn't invited to her party. Her parents had a big cookout for her last year but wanted to keep it smaller this year--just immediate family and some of her little friends (and their parents). But I'm pretty sure her uncle's girlfriend was there so I'm feeling a bit left out and sorry for myself. She's a sweet thing and I've kept her quite a bit . I have her a gift , just have to figure out when I can give it to her.

I'm sorry kimber.    I know the feeling.  My sister-in-law invited practically everyone but me to her baby shower next week, and my niece's 4th birthday party this weekend.  (Though in my case I have conflicted feelings; I'm relieved about not having to go make small-talk with people I barely know, but it would still be nice to feel like I'm wanted there.)

And I also just found out that all my female cousins and two of my aunts get together every month for a "girls' trip".  They're in Denver right now.  I like to travel, I'm a girl... why don't they ask me?   

Anyway, I hope you're able to see your great niece soon.  I know it's small consolation, but maybe seeing her and giving her your present separately, without all those other people around, will focus her attention and cement her memory of you better.

 

[kimber8ada]

Thanks, Artemis. I did see my niece last night. Her grandparents (my sister and brother-in-law) where keeping her and her five month old sister so I went to their house and spent a few hours with them both and you're right, it was better having the one on one time. I don't mean to sound like I'm excluded a lot. I get along well with my family. It's just that I'm single with no children so sometimes I get a bit down when everyone else is enjoying family activities. I know I can't be included with all their family time, and I really don't expect to be, but like I said sometimes I get a bit lonely and wish I had more people just to hang out with., since I don't have any really close friends.

[Artemis]

16 minutes ago, kimber8ada said:

It's just that I'm single with no children so sometimes I get a bit down when everyone else is enjoying family activities. I know I can't be included with all their family time, and I really don't expect to be, but like I said sometimes I get a bit lonely and wish I had more people just to hang out with., since I don't have any really close friends.

I get you.  It's hard, and it can be very lonely.  Especially when, like you said, you're watching everyone else enjoying family activities.
 

 

[Carol the Dabbler]

9 hours ago, Artemis said:

When I went to Germany I was told to pack for warm spring temps, so I brought mostly t-shirts and a light jacket.  By the time I got there, temps had fallen below freezing and it was snowing.  Since then I always pack at least one item for all kinds of weather.

Also, it seems like one area's idea of "warm" may be more like my idea of "cool" (or vice versa), so I'm like you, try to provide for a range of weather.  Layers work well, so you can wear as many or as few as you need.

9 hours ago, Artemis said:

My sister-in-law invited practically everyone but me to her baby shower next week, and my niece's 4th birthday party this weekend.  [....]

And I also just found out that all my female cousins and two of my aunts get together every month for a "girls' trip". 

I know that feeling!  I knew that my cousin (the only one on my father's side) was about to get married, had bought her a present and was just waiting for the invitation so I'd know when/where.  Then the expected fat white envelope arrived, but it was an announcement -- she'd gotten married a couple days before!

Also, my brother happened to mention that he was going to our uncle's 75th-birthday party, which was the first I'd heard of it.  He suggested that I go too, but I hadn't been invited, and it occurred to me that they were probably expecting just immediate family, plus my brother because he's the same age as my uncle's son, who was presumably visiting from California.  But no, I found out afterward that they'd invited the whole family -- except me.

I now suspect that in both cases I would have been invited if I'd been living here at the time, but I "obviously" couldn't attend because I was living a few hours' drive away, and they didn't want to make it look like they were just fishing for presents.

You apparently live near your family, but my point is that people make all sorts of assumptions, mostly well-intentioned but often misguided.  For example, maybe your cousins assume that you're not interested in their jaunts simply because they don't often see you -- so it's sort of a self-perpetuating misconception.

Trouble is, a person can't really ask why they weren't invited, so neither of us may ever know for sure.  But I moved back here some years ago, and as far as I'm aware I haven't been left out of anything since (not that there's been much).  Maybe if you suggested a get-together with your cousins (lunch at a restaurant or something), they'd realize you aren't quite the loner that they thought.

[Artemis]

3 hours ago, Carol the Dabbler said:

Also, it seems like one area's idea of "warm" may be more like my idea of "cool" (or vice versa),

That’s funny, isn’t it?  Once when I visited Las Vegas, the temperature was in the mid 70’s and people were talking about how “cold” it was.  Cold.  And I kid you not, I saw some people bundling up in winter coats.  I was too warm, and thoroughly baffled.  In Minnesota, people start wearing shorts and cooking outside again as soon as it hits 20’s and 30’s in February/March, lol.  A few wear shorts year-round.  30 feels warm after a month or two of temps in the negatives, lol.

I should clarify that for my Germany trip I was told specifically to pack for temps in the 60’s.  I was just too lazy to Google the conversion to Celsius for other readers, so I generically converted “60’s” to “warm spring”, which is what I’d consider 60’s to be (in Minnesota, at least).  I didn’t expect colder than 50’s, maybe 40’s.  Especially seeing as we were experiencing a global heat wave at the time and temps in MN were in the 90’s.  I even asked our experienced travel guide (who had visited Germany every year for over 20 years) if I should expect temps lower than the 50’s, and he said definitely not, lol.  Live and learn.

3 hours ago, Carol the Dabbler said:

Maybe if you suggested a get-together with your cousins (lunch at a restaurant or something), they'd realize you aren't quite the loner that they thought.

But when I do that, they’re always “too busy” to find time for it.  Yet they’re never too busy for each other.    After awhile of being turned down, I start to feel like maybe I’m just being an annoyance and they’d secretly rather I didn’t ask so they wouldn’t have to come up with excuses not to.

I know that at least one of my cousins in the “girls group” has a very poor opinion of me.  (Which is weird to me, because I feel like I barely know her.)  My aunt lived with me for awhile when she was low on funds, and she used to talk to her daughter on speaker phone, and not very quietly.  So I heard everything they said about me.

I don’t know if that has anything to do with why I’m not invited to their outings, but I can’t help but wonder if it just boils down to them not caring for my company.  I’m not sure they’ll ever give me a chance.

 

[Arcadia]

I know the feeling. I paint together with a group about once week, and we'd do other stuff together from time to time. But about a year and a half ago (?) something changed. They stopped having other outings, and every invitation I've made to do something/come over has been ignored or turned down. Part of it is they all have grandchildren now. But recently I discovered some of them are still having get-togethers, they're just not inviting me anymore. I'm pretty hurt by it. I can't decide whether to blurt that out, or just stay quiet and enjoy our "paint-outs" in hopes they'll start liking me again.

[Carol the Dabbler]

11 hours ago, Arcadia said:

They stopped having other outings, and every invitation I've made to do something/come over has been ignored or turned down. Part of it is they all have grandchildren now. But recently I discovered some of them are still having get-togethers, they're just not inviting me anymore.

Do you happen to know, are their new outings kid-oriented -- them and their grandchildren?

[Arcadia]

Nope, it's them and them. But the grandchildren take up the bulk of their time, which I do understand (even if I don't exactly appreciate it!) It's when I discover they've had lunch or a movie together, and didn't include me, that I feel a little weird. Sometimes when I show up for our weekly "paint in", I get the feeling they were hoping I wouldn't. I couldn't, for awhile, and now that I'm back, I'm feeling less welcome than before. I show up anyway because the alternative is to have no social interaction at all, and I can't deal with that right now.

[Carol the Dabbler]

4 hours ago, Arcadia said:

... now that I'm back, I'm feeling less welcome than before. I show up anyway because the alternative is to have no social interaction at all, and I can't deal with that right now.

Heck, you need social interaction at just about any time.  Keep going to your painting sessions, and meanwhile look around for other possibilities.  You've mentioned having some friends, so maybe start there -- suggest some get-togethers with one or more of them, maybe ask them to suggest social activities that they enjoy, etc.

Of course I'm a fine one to talk! 

[Arcadia]

Well, it's the same with the other friends … they don't have time for me any more. Although in most cases, they genuinely don't have the time, due to … AHEM … babysitting duties. Or travelling. Or both. At any rate, I notice I'm the only one doing the inviting … I can't remember the last time anyone invited me to do something. *sigh* Time to make new friends, but that was never my strong suit. I only have so many now because they included me, not the other way round. Left to my own devices, I only have one or two at a time. Which is okay, when they're close friends. But even my two closest friends are … unavailable. *sniff*

Ah well … I have a cat.