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Here's how it goes:

 

1.   Let's Play Murder is basically what it says on the tin. You describe a person and a setting and then people submit their ideas on how to murder them. Include things like what the person likes or medical conditions. Can be as detailed as you want. Don't have to describe a certain someone you hate (although you should. Just think of this as free anger management if you do.).

 

2.   The person who submits a description of a victim and setting cannot participate in submitting ideas on how to kill them.

 

3.   Feel free to dispute each other's ideas.

 

4.   Oh, and bonus points if you tell us how you're going to get rid of the body.

 

 

Alternatively, you could describe a victim, setting, and murderer, and see if people can figure out how the murderer did it. :P

 

 

 

I'll start:

 

Victim: Male, 14 years old, 5'3. Suffers from mild asthma. He has his school ID on a lanyard round his neck and is wearing a hoodie.

 

Setting: Typical school bathroom. You and the victim are alone in the bathroom.

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  :wacko:  :blink:  :o

 

Now I'm even more frightened of you....

 

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Okay, um, I'm rubbish at this kind of stuff, but, um, eeeek, ew ew ew ew ew.... pull his hoodie over his face and strangle him with the lanyard.

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  :wacko:  :blink:  :o

 

Now I'm even more frightened of you....

 

Yeah, I know. As if the 'unregistered boat thing' wasn't enough...

 

 

 

If you kill someone in international waters on an unregistered boat and throw the body overboard, they can't trace it back to any one legal system so you won't be prosecuted...

 

;)

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Okay, um, I'm rubbish at this kind of stuff, but, um, eeeek, ew ew ew ew ew.... pull his hoodie over his face and strangle him with the lanyard.

 

I don't know, I thought that was pretty good :)

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Oh gawd, this fandom is ruining me................

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Let's give the others time so they can come up with something, yeah? If yours is the only one then I guess then it's your turn to give a description of victim and setting. :)

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Oh gawd, this fandom is ruining me................

 

The really scary part for me is that I didn't fully think of how cold-hearted this seems until you just posted the above! Yikes. Maybe I'm turning into Sherlock...

 

Ah, well, if I can have his brain as well...

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Uh-oh, I forgot to get rid of the body. Ummmm..... stuff him in the trash can, which conveniently is the big gray kind with wheels. Wheel him out to the equally convenient trash compactor out back. Squish.

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Too much information!!! :D

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Bleccchh!!!

 

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Or maybe instead of a industrial trash compactor one of those large incinerators instead?

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What the hell kind of a school would have a bloody incinerator in the back?

 

my kind of school, yeah, but...

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Okay, I assume I've waited long enough, I'm committing another murder.

 

The victim:

6 feet tall, slender, mid to late 30's, with a thatch of dark curly hair and a Belstaff coat. Trained in bartitsu. Found lying dead on the sidewalk outside a hospital.

 

The murderer:

Teenaged girl. The only things in her possession besides the clothes she's wearing are a bendy straw, a doodle of Benedict Cumberbatch, and a melon. There is a boat nearby.

 

How'd she do it?

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this isn't how it works but oh well I'll just add that in as an alternative play style

 

She stabbed him in the eye with the straw until it reached his brain, and just in case he survived that she smashed a melon on his head. And then she hid his body in the boat and covered it with a tarp.

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Wait a second...
 

Okay, I assume I've waited long enough, I'm committing another murder.

The victim:
6 feet tall, slender, mid to late 30's, with a thatch of dark curly hair and a Belstaff coat. Trained in bartitsu. Found lying dead on the sidewalk outside a hospital.

 
Um...
 

 

The murderer:

Teenaged girl. The only things in her possession besides the clothes she's wearing are a bendy straw, a doodle of Benedict Cumberbatch, and a melon. There is a boat nearby.

 

are you trying to tell me something, Arcadia?

 

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:whistle:  :angel2:

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Alternatively, you can throw the melon at his head first to stun him and knock him down, and then get on top of him and shove the straw through his eye. Although it may not kill him, the straw. If the straw doesn't do it, pull it out, point your fingers in a V, and double-eye-poke as hard as you can. :)

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Let's just hope this is all happening to the real dead body not the fake one that took it's place. Which covers this particular "murder" because Sherlock was not dead. But there was a dead body at one point.

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Alternatively, you can throw the melon at his head first to stun him and knock him down, and then get on top of him and shove the straw through his eye. Although it may not kill him, the straw. If the straw doesn't do it, pull it out, point your fingers in a V, and double-eye-poke as hard as you can. :)

 

 

Is this a Sherlock - Three Stooges crossover?  :P

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Yes. I'm Moe.

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I guess since I've got the only idea as to how you can kill someone with a melon and a bendy straw, I'm gonna provide the next description:

 

Victim: Female, 8 years old, about 4 feet tall. A bit pudgy. Has no medical conditions or allergies.

 

Setting: You're babysitting her at her house. Both of you are in the kitchen. She's got a duo of crazy little brothers that barge in every five minutes, though, so you better kill her fast.

 

 

 

 

Can I tell you guys about a terrible tragedy that happened to me today while you're theorizing?  :unsure: 

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