Introverts, how is your day?

[SherlockedCAMPer]

 

 

What is the curly girl method?

When you wash your hair use a sulfate-free cleanser or only conditioner. If you use a cleanser, follow it with a conditioner (a generous handful depending on length of hair) and take out the knots and tangles in your hair using your fingers only, Scrunching the hair to help it keep its natural wave/curl shape. Do not rinse out the conditioner completely. Once done with the washing, use a t-shirt or similar absorbent lightweight fabric to dry the hair. Never use a brush or comb in those curls as they force straighten the curls and waves to varying degrees. Also, if a hairdryer is used, it needs to be a diffuser on low to medium heat as anything warmer will dry out the hair. The book this is from is called Curly Girl The Handbook by Lorraine Massey. I got it from my local library but Amazon also carries it. (Also don't let the title scare them off, but it's great for the guys with curly hair as well. The expanded second edition has a whole chapter for them.)

My hair is currently pretty short (two or three inches), but I'd be interested in trying that. Can you give me an example of a sulfate-free cleanser? (I'm not familiar with the term.) Guess I could try it with my usual conditioner, though.

 

I'm guessing this works best on hair that's washed every day or so, which is definitely not the case with mine (which tends to be dry, so I never wash it more often than every week or two, and it often goes longer when I'm in a rush). I've been using shampoo, but otherwise I do quite a bit like you say: Wash, then wrap in a bath towel (just wrap, no rubbing), then fluff it up with my fingers and/or use a diffuser-type dryer on low. What's the difference between a towel and a tshirt -- simply that the hair stays damper?

Sulfate free= no Sodium Lauryl, Sodium Laureth, or Ammonium Laureth Sulfate (the stuff that makes soaps and shampoos bubbly). Many plant based shampoos are Sulfate free. And I realized that I forgot to mention that the conditioner should be botanical (plant based).

 

Towels are generally heavier weighing down the hair thus flattening curls and pulling hair. An older, thinner towel could work as well. The point is to scrunch the hair with the shirt to help the natural curl/wave shape while getting rid of excess water.

[Carol the Dabbler]

OK, so you don't wrap the towel or shirt like a turban, you just scrunch at your hair with it?  Any good brands of cleanser or conditioner to recommend?

[SherlockedCAMPer]

OK, so you don't wrap the towel or shirt like a turban, you just scrunch at your hair with it? Any good brands of cleanser or conditioner to recommend?

1) Yes 2) whatever works with your hair that is plant-based and free of sulfates and silicone. If the conditioner contains mint, lemongrass, and/or rosemary in the first half of ingredients that also helps. Plant-based emollients, humectants, and moisturizers as well.

[Van Buren Supernova]

Is it what you call dry shampoo?

I've seen it mentioned around but not sure what it is.

 

For me, I have to wash my hair everyday. At the longest, two days if I don't leave home. Of course the exception is situation when I'm not able to, like mountain or camping.

 

Even when it's bloody cold, even when it's 2 a.m in the morning, I still wash my hair if I come back home from outside. Then I deal with the cold by cursing or jumping around.

 

Not sure if that is OCD, I have to clean up everytime I come back home. Shower, feet, hair washing. The rule is everything from outside have to be 'neutralized', and only after shower & hairwash that I should touch my bed.

 

P.S. Imagine my agony when friend comes by and sit on my bed before shower!

If I were Sherlock, I would kick Irene out. Twice.

[SherlockedCAMPer]

Definitely not dry shampoo as most people with curly/wavy hair have dry hair versus normal or oily and dry shampoo just makes the hair worse.

[Carol the Dabbler]

Camper, what brand of shampoo are you using?

[SherlockedCAMPer]

Camper, what brand of shampoo are you using?

365 Everyday Value Normal to Dry Fragrance Free (since been reformulated to be more plant based & all hair types so I can't use it because of a severe allergy of a friends' family) and Earth Science Ceramide Care fragrance free. The 365 I use on the lower half of my head and the Earth Science on the upper half (35 inches of hair has the roots oily and the tips & scalp dry which is not uncommon for long hair). And I use the old formulation of the 365 fragrance free conditioner. (Currently in the hunt for a coconut free, alcohol free, gluten free plant-based shampoo & conditioner that is also fragrance free. Or a good diy recipe of the same).

[Carol the Dabbler]

Good luck!  I know from past searches that -- despite the marketing claims -- most shampoos are pretty much the same.  It's hard to find any without the "laureth" ingredients, let alone without other things as well.

[SherlockedCAMPer]

Good luck! I know from past searches that -- despite the marketing claims -- most shampoos are pretty much the same. It's hard to find any without the "laureth" ingredients, let alone without other things as well.

It's easier to find one without the laureth/laurel when shopping at a place such as Whole Foods Market or equivalent. The alcohol is near impossible as I've seen other products claim to be alcohol free while containing a form of alcohol (I paid too much attention in High School chemistry to know there are more forms of alcohol than plain ethanol) & coconut is difficult to get away from when going plant based (but that is the severe allergy for my friends).

[Pseudonym]

Nipping back onto topic - my experiment into being more sociable continues... tomorrow I am going to a pub quiz with four people I have never met before. Bit scared.

[elbafo]

Nipping back onto topic - my experiment into being more sociable continues... tomorrow I am going to a pub quiz with four people I have never met before. Bit scared.

Wow! All the best with that!

Sometimes I can do those sorts of things with complete strangers, but feel more uncomfortable if there's even one person who knows me. It's kinda like a 'starting with a clean slate' thing.

In the distant past, I'd go to a 'thing' and forget I'm supposed to interact with people. If it's something like a short course, I'd come away with 'wow, awesome, I've learnt so much!' And then I realise (by the end) that other people have paired up or formed little clique-y coffee groups. They've MADE NEW FRIENDS! And I forgot to.

[Van Buren Supernova]

Tell us how it goes.

Don't think I've been in those situation (when I know no one) for the purpose of purely social. Normally it's new workplaces, some other activities (that we gather for the activity not for the social), so to be honest, that sounds really scary for me, especially, that you expect to socialize and there is no one to fall back too. Gah!

 

In younger days, there were always pressure to be social and I remember treating it like, maybe borrow Sherlock's term, 'battle'.

 

I'd conceive a strategy, just like when I started uni, we only had 61 people in the class, the selection was rigorous and spots were very limited. And I knew that eventually there would be groupwork (hate that!). So on very first day, first time we laid our eyes on each other, I pick one person, who I suspect could be a friend of mine, and could be my 'bridge' and approached her. We successfully became good friend, and she was a great person, opposite of me, good talker, social, she even helped getting me out of trouble because I clashed with my lecturer for questioning ..uhm.. their stupid 'wisdom'. Eventually I made more good friends on my own and including her, our group was the only one that stayed strong until the end of uni time and after (not now though).

Luckily in high school, I was the one being approached by those who were then became friends.

 

I have no much problem making friends back then, but naturally, I need longggg time and it can't be forced. There were times when I instantly click with stranger, but normally it's someone I would know for a while (for example collague), I have hard time trusting stranger is the way they seem genuinely on the first meeting, eventhough I like them. Because most probably first meeting is normally the best behavior that may or may not be true.

 

Long story short: I don't have that courage. XD so, good for you!

[Pseudonym]

I did it the week before last when I went out to dinner with another group I didn't know, and that went fairly well but most of them were a lot older than me. Still it's given me the guts to do it again with another group, though yea it is a bit scary. I'm thinking because it's a pub quiz at least the questions automatically give you something to talk about. 

 

I don't think I've ever gone to meet a group of complete strangers who already know each other before. The closest thing is probably when I went to uni, like you said, but then at least no one knew each other. 

[Artemis]

I've never heard of a pub quiz.  What is it?

 

 

[Fantasy Lover]

It's a quiz in a pub.

[Artemis]

What kind of a quiz?  Like one you'd take in school?  Do you get graded?  Do you answer out loud or on paper?  How does it work?

 

 

[Pseudonym]

:o Is it a British thing? We do love anything to do with the pub. Basically it's put on by the pub, who has a quiz master, and loads of people go and form teams, usually with as ridiculous a name as they can come up with, and for a few hours you drink and compete against the other teams. There are usually loads of different rounds, general knowledge, music, picture, science etc. Some of the new ones are electronic and each team has a controller to answer the questions. The older ones are on paper. 

[Artemis]

Oh, that sounds fun!

 

 

[Pseudonym]

I'm useless at them, but they are usually good fun. 

[SherlockedCAMPer]

We have them here in the US as well. I have a friend who does pub quizzes with his fiancée on a regular basis at a couple of different places here in the Twin Cities.

[Carol the Dabbler]

Are those places British-style pubs, though?

[Pseudonym]

I have returned! ''Twas good, but we didn't win so no cash

[elbafo]

Glad to hear it was enjoyable, Pseud. We have quiz nights in Australia as well. Sometimes they're called "Trivia Nights". I always fail dismally with the sports questions, and that's where hubby excels.

[Van Buren Supernova]

Quiz night sound fun actually, but I would feel the pressure to do well, eventhough nobody is required to I suppose.

 

At least it's not a pure socialization gathering, like some kind of networking or mass dating or I don't know what I'm talking about, I mean something you don't have other activity to fall back to.

 

@Meeting a group of strangers when they already know each other?

I rant about it before, although technically different because I know one. Somehow my friend thought it was a good idea to include me into his inner circle without telling me. We planned an activity, I thought it's only both of us (not romantic, it's based on common interest. Anyway, he knows my status) and when I showed up, there were five of his friends coming along. It's annoying because he didn't tell me and it was only about the time I started to consider him as friend outside work too.

 

He did it again and successful when we planned for trip (this time four people) and dragged his friends along after I had already agreed to that thinking it's only four of us. He should know since I always declined other trips with them and explicitly said I wasn't comfortable because I didn't know them well, and to me, I only go for leisure trip (purely recreational without certain goal/activities) with only, very very selective people because it's the almost 24 hours together thing.

 

His friends are okay, they are good people, I was putting effort too to be pleasant but eventually I felt so overwhelmed I stayed in with other friend who was tired (one of the original four) in hotel on the last night/third night (I have lousy social battery) and skipped dinner, and he was very disappointed about that, although he probably knew and tried to 'fix' it by surprisingly joined me on morning walk to see nice scenery around, nice quiet time before everyone woke up since he knows I like to do that.

[Pseudonym]

I definitely don't like that, one of my friends does it too, I think I'm just meeting her and she'll randomly bring other people along without any warning. I think I actually find it easier not knowing anyone, when it's a friend of a friend I start feeling like a third wheel. I wouldn't like discovering he'd unexpectedly brought loads of other people either. 

 

For other events, one of my friends asked me if I'd be up for going speed dating, and uh, no. That's my idea of absolute hell.