Speedy's Cafe - General Chat about anything you like!

[Pseudonym]

I don't know, yes rape 'multiple times' seems extreme, but I'm sure it's happened to some people. Rape, to me, would mean actual literal rape, otherwise I would term something as sexual assault. But having never been in that situation I don't know. 

 

The weird thing, with the whole #metoo trend, is that my initial response was no, I haven't, and then I thought about it and realised that actually yea, it's true. But sometimes the more extreme things aren't the ones that stick with you.  

 

I've been groped, or had someone attempt to grope me a few times. One was in a club, when someone thought it was fine to put his hand up my skirt, one was a boss who thought it was fun to pinch the ladies bums when they were bending over. Both not nice, but not traumatising. But I once went into a car shop to buy a headlight bulb, and though nothing physical happened I was subjected to so much leering and 'flirting' that I've vowed never ever to go in there alone again. Before that it never even occurred to me that a car shop wouldn't be a safe place to go - I had one guy practically holding the bulb ransom - I'll give you the bulb if you let me buy you dinner. I was in there on my own with about six men. He probably thought it was fun harmless flirting, I hated it and it seemed to go on forever. Now you can't term that sexual harassment because there was no touching, but it was intimidating. I just wanted, and expected, to be treated like any other customer. 

 

The worst thing that ever happened was when I was about ten, and was trapped up a tree (yes, I was young enough that I thought climbing trees was fun) and was assaulted by a boy who was eleven with a golf club. I was fully dressed, so it wasn't sexual assault in that sense, but he was trying to touch me places no ten year old should be touched, with the golf club. That was the occasion that by the time I escaped the tree I ran home and sobbed for hours and never told anyone what had happened. It's something I hadn't thought about for years, but recently, with all this talk, I've remembered it and thought how wrong it was. Was that sexual assault by the standard of the law? Probably not. Would anything have been done? No. But I found it incredibly upsetting and was too young to know what to do. 

 

Not to mention that when something happens that is demonstrably wrong and illegal it's practically impossible to prove and unlikely to result in a conviction. My tree story is mild compared to a lot of people's experiences, but even with that I was too ashamed to tell my mother when she was desperately asking why I was so upset. It must be damn near impossible to share when something truly horrific happens. 

[Pseudonym]

Nipping back to language, do you all pronounce 'demonstrably' as de-monst-rably? So the middle sounds like monster?

[Carol the Dabbler]

 

I'm still trying to figure out how the British manage to get "aluminium" out of a word that's spelled "aluminum." Or "alazarian" out of a word that's spelled "alizarin."

 

Never heard of that second word before, but the British don't get "aluminium" out of a word that's spelt "aluminum," they get it out of a word that's actually spelt "aluminium."  I just had a look at that Wikipedia page, as mentioned by Tobe back a ways.  It's interesting.  By the usual rules (whoever names it first gets to pick the name), it probably should be "alumium."  Which sounds even sillier than "aluminium."  ;)

 

Growing up, we didn't just muddy up our vowels, but there were a few consonants that were problematic as well.  In particular, we pronounced the word for cow dung (manure) not as man-oo-ur but as ba-nur.  I once went to the hardware store in spring to get some to fertilize my garden (angry as heck that I had to buy cow dung), and they said they didn't have it.  A friend heard the story and said, "now, go back to the store and ask for man-oo-ur and see if you have any luck."  I did.   :D

 

I say muh-NOOR myself, and people seem to understand it OK.

 

It's not just pronunciation, though, it's vocabulary as well.  I was at a garden center one spring, looking at their tomato transplants, and an older fellow came in asking for "mango plants."  The young clerk looked as bewildered as if he'd asked for banana plants, but (having heard the same term from my father) I interrupted and asked the fellow if he meant bell peppers, and he said yes in a tone that implied "of course!"  I then explained to the two of them that my best guess was that green bell peppers had once been used as a substitute for green mangoes in a popular pickle recipe.

 

Nipping back to language, do you all pronounce 'demonstrably' as de-monst-rably? So the middle sounds like monster?

 

I say "de-MON-stra-bly."  I guess it sounds a little like "monster," but of course I pronounce the "r" in "monster," so not exactly, no.  Good enough for some kind of a pun, I suppose.

[Pseudonym]

How do you pronounce the ‘r’? I think it sounds like ‘monsta’ when I say it.

[SherlockedCAMPer]

I know when I say monster it would be mon-ster (stir).

[Boton]

 

 

It's not just pronunciation, though, it's vocabulary as well.  I was at a garden center one spring, looking at their tomato transplants, and an older fellow came in asking for "mango plants."  The young clerk looked as bewildered as if he'd asked for banana plants, but (having heard the same term from my father) I interrupted and asked the fellow if he meant bell peppers, and he said yes in a tone that implied "of course!"  I then explained to the two of them that my best guess was that green bell peppers had once been used as a substitute for green mangoes in a popular pickle recipe.

 

 

 

When I was in the Junior League, we were (inevitably) publishing a cookbook.  During the recipe phase, I was given "mango punch." Now, as an Indiana girl, my first thought was to go get bell peppers, but that didn't make sense.  I'd heard of a fruit called a mango, but I hadn't the slightest idea what it looked like or where it would come from, so I think I bought cans of mango juice to make the recipe.

 

By the way, I now love the Thai dessert mango and sticky rice.  It doesn't involve peppers.  :-)

[Carol the Dabbler]

How do you pronounce the ‘r’? I think it sounds like ‘monsta’ when I say it.

Just say "monst-" and then pretend you're a hostile dog for the "rrr" ending. Or listen to the dialog in American shows and movies.

[Pseudonym]

I must have seen loads of Americans saying monster in various shows but never noticed it being said in a certain way.

[J.P.]

You will probably find other sources online, but this one is my favorite:

https://dict.leo.org/englisch-deutsch/monster

You can click the little triangle before the word to hear it spoken. Can't tell which version is it though. Probably some kind of neutered British :P

[Carol the Dabbler]

You will probably find other sources online, but this one is my favorite:

https://dict.leo.org/englisch-deutsch/monster

You can click the little triangle before the word to hear it spoken. Can't tell which version is it though. Probably some kind of neutered British :P

 

Took me a while to find the triangle, but yup, that's the British pronunciation.  Thanks for the idea of linking to a dictionary site!  Here's the American version -- click on the little red speaker symbol.

[Hikari]

 

 

 

It's not just pronunciation, though, it's vocabulary as well.  I was at a garden center one spring, looking at their tomato transplants, and an older fellow came in asking for "mango plants."  The young clerk looked as bewildered as if he'd asked for banana plants, but (having heard the same term from my father) I interrupted and asked the fellow if he meant bell peppers, and he said yes in a tone that implied "of course!"  I then explained to the two of them that my best guess was that green bell peppers had once been used as a substitute for green mangoes in a popular pickle recipe.

 

 

 

When I was in the Junior League, we were (inevitably) publishing a cookbook.  During the recipe phase, I was given "mango punch." Now, as an Indiana girl, my first thought was to go get bell peppers, but that didn't make sense.  I'd heard of a fruit called a mango, but I hadn't the slightest idea what it looked like or where it would come from, so I think I bought cans of mango juice to make the recipe.

 

By the way, I now love the Thai dessert mango and sticky rice.  It doesn't involve peppers.  :-)

 

 

I find regional differences in speech fascinating.  Except for college and a brief stint in Asia, I've spent my whole life in Ohio and I've not once heard 'mango' used for 'green bell pepper'.  Not even now, when I'm 30 minutes from the Indiana border.

 

I grew up on the other side of the state, approximately 5 miles from the PA border.   I attended college in Western PA, only about 40 miles from my parents' house.  It was there, in a heavily Amish influenced area that I first heard the term 'buggy' used for 'shopping cart'.  To me a 'buggy' is either something drawn by a horse or something we put a baby in, not foodstuffs.

 

Where I live now they have a dish referred to as 'ham and beans'.  First time I heard that was on the menu, I was like "Yum!  I love baked beans with ham!"  Except that what I got was green beans with chunks of ham tossed in.  O-kay.

I also had managed to live my entire 35 years before moving here without once partaking of a 'shredded chicken sandwich', which is shredded chicken out of a can mixed with mushroom soup and breadcrumbs and served on a white hamburger bun.  No seasoning or taste of any kind added.  Were it not for the extremely high sodium content, I'd say it's a crackerjack meal for invalids.  It's so soft and bland, it hardly requires chewing.

 

Pulled pork sandwiches is the only type of shredded meat I really care for, turns out.

[Pseudonym]

Ha, the two different versions of monster are funny. I don't say it quite like the first version but closer to that than the second. 

 

Eurgh no that shredded chicken sandwich sounds vile. 

[Carol the Dabbler]

I find regional differences in speech fascinating.  Except for college and a brief stint in Asia, I've spent my whole life in Ohio and I've not once heard 'mango' used for 'green bell pepper'.  Not even now, when I'm 30 minutes from the Indiana border.

 

I grew up on the other side of the state, approximately 5 miles from the PA border.   I attended college in Western PA, only about 40 miles from my parents' house.  It was there, in a heavily Amish influenced area that I first heard the term 'buggy' used for 'shopping cart'.  To me a 'buggy' is either something drawn by a horse or something we put a baby in, not foodstuffs.

 

Where I live now they have a dish referred to as 'ham and beans'.  First time I heard that was on the menu, I was like "Yum!  I love baked beans with ham!"  Except that what I got was green beans with chunks of ham tossed in.  O-kay.

 

I also had managed to live my entire 35 years before moving here without once partaking of a 'shredded chicken sandwich', which is shredded chicken out of a can mixed with mushroom soup and breadcrumbs and served on a white hamburger bun.  No seasoning or taste of any kind added.  Were it not for the extremely high sodium content, I'd say it's a crackerjack meal for invalids.  It's so soft and bland, it hardly requires chewing.

 

"Mango" may have been more of a central/southern Indiana term, and I don't believe it's really current around here anymore either.  For one thing, as you say, the actual fruit is becoming better known.

 

I've lived in central/southern Indiana, eastern Massachusetts, eastern Iowa, western New York state, southern California, and back to Indiana, and I've never heard a shopping cart called anything except a shopping cart, at least not anywhere that I was living.  It's apparently called a "trolley" in the UK -- which makes no sense to me, but then language is apparently not required to make sense.

 

If I saw "ham and beans" on a menu, I would expect a thick soup made from dried navy beans with lots of ham.  Here in central/southern Indiana, green beans with ham would simply be called "green beans" (with the ham taken for granted, unless it was really lots and lots of ham).  Same with baked beans (which I believe are more typically vegetarian in the UK).

 

Mercifully, I have never heard of a shredded chicken sandwich till now (and shall attempt to forget about it as quickly as possible).  The local specialties here include (one of my favorites) pea salad (green peas, cubes of cheese, a bit of pickle relish, and mayonnaise -- some people may add chopped hard-boiled egg, celery, etc.).  Then there's a "tenderloin sandwich," which is a piece of pork tenderloin (or so they say -- who can tell?) pounded till it's nearly thin enough to read through, then breaded and fried, and served on a hamburger bun.  Tenderloins are judged by their diameter, with the best ones described as "even bigger than the bun."  There's persimmon pudding, which comes in two types (scoopable and cuttable -- I make the scoopable kind, which to my thinking is the "real" persimmon pudding).  Both kinds are made from wild American persimmons, and taste like them (yum!).

[T.o.b.y]

You guys are making me hungry! Even though the only food you have mentioned that I would actually eat is probably your persimmon pudding, Carol.

 

Here, they make something called "Birnen, Bohnen und Speck", which is green beans, pears and bacon cooked together. It sounds weird but when I was still eating meat, I liked it.

 

Question: what is the traditional Christmas dish where you live?

 

Here, Christmas is celebrated on the 24th. Between going to church and opening presents, people don't typically have time for a big meal, so lots of families actually eat something simple - sausages (think frankfurters) and potato salad is a popular combination. The feast is then held on the 25th and while various roasts are common, carp is also a very traditional choice.

 

My family is mostly vegetarian and my husband has adapted to meatless Christmas Eve admirably well. I don't like singing about peace and love with a corpse on the table.

[Carol the Dabbler]

Come visit me sometime and I'll make a persimmon pudding!  (I just bought some frozen persimmon pulp at the food co-op, so I'm prepared.)

 

I think the usual American Christmas dinner (generally served in early afternoon on Christmas Day) is turkey and its traditional accompaniments.  At least that's what I grew up with.  The turkey is roasted with some sort of stuffing inside (Mom always made ordinary bread stuffing, with celery and herbs), then there's Waldorf salad (apples, celery, walnuts, raisins, and mayonnaise -- though I now make it with fresh red grapes rather than raisins), cranberry sauce (cooked, sweetened cranberries), mashed potatoes, gravy, sweet potatoes (also known here as "yams," though they are not), another vegetable or two, and hot dinner rolls (or bread) and butter.  Then of course there's dessert -- we always had pumpkin-custard pie with whipped cream and mincemeat pie -- and there were always assorted homemade cookies available if anyone got hungry later on.

[Pseudonym]

The only persimmon I've ever encountered is the building company 'Persimmon Homes.' (Another Holmes sibling?)

 

Here Christmas dinner is similar to what Carol described, turkey with loads of veggies. In years gone by my mother would do various roasts, beef, ham, maybe a turducken (which always horrifies me), but I am very squeamish about eating meat, so now that family Christmases are quite small my mother tends to just do a chicken for her and my father, and a ham for sandwiches. We pull Christmas crackers before we start eating, each containing a paper hat, a joke, and a cheap toy. The 'winner' of each cracker reads out their corny joke, everyone puts on their paper kings hat, and there are normally a few laughs about whatever corny toy they got. I usually have to read out every joke since I'm the only one who can read them without having to dig out reading glasses. 

 

The classic dessert is a Christmas pudding, which is a dome shaped fruit cake with money hidden in it, which gets covered with brandy or sherry and set alight. I hate fruit cake, so that's something else that has gone by the wayside, we normally have a trifle and some kind of gateau. 

 

I have a question for the Americans - what are biscuits and grits? I think I've asked before but I can't remember the answer, and 'grits' sounds gross. 

[Carol the Dabbler]

In the US, "biscuit" can mean any of several things, but if you just say "biscuit" out of context, people will generally think of what's sometimes called a baking-powder biscuit. In British terms, it's very similar to a scone, except that it's not sweetened and it's generally round instead of triangular. Biscuits are generally eaten hot, right out of the oven, with some sort of topping -- just butter, or butter and jam, or gravy. In the first two instances, they are picked up and eaten by biting them, but in the latter case they are eaten with a fork.

 

To explain grits, I first need to explain hominy, which is made from dried corn (maize) kernals by soaking them in a lye solution till the skins can be easily removed. Then the inner part is coarsely ground and dried (or perhaps dried and then ground, I really have no idea). The resulting bits are cooked and eaten more or less like rice, either as a side dish (often with gravy) or (I think) as a hot cereal. I've eaten them with eggs for breakfast, and they're pretty good.

[SherlockedCAMPer]

Traditional Christmas dinner in the US can vary depending on ethnic makeup. Growing up it was traditionally ham or lutefisk (latter only when at grandparents) along with Swedish meatballs, Swedish sausage, & pickled herrings for the meat, lefse ([think potato and flour tortilla made from scratch] buttered and sugared to taste by the person eating it), mashed potatoes, gravy, green beans, jellied cranberries, and a whole bunch of cookies (there were nearly 30 people at dinner). Nowadays it's Swedish meatballs, possibly lefse if I've made any, mashed potatoes, green beans, mint chocolate soymilk, & something for desert (I'm generally in charge of Christmas dinner if my parents host and it's around 10 at most).

[Carol the Dabbler]

No more lutefisk?  ;)

[SherlockedCAMPer]

No more lutefisk? ;)

No thankfully. Also I'm very allergic to seafood (we didn't realize my reaction as a child meant an allergy) so even if I didn't mind how bad good lutefisk smelled, it couldn't be in the house.

[Carol the Dabbler]

Your allergy may be doing you a favor then!

[Van Buren Supernova]

First time I hear about lutefisk.

A fish? I suppose it has.. certain smell then?

 

Never have proper planned Christmas dinner I think. We don't really celebrate it properly. There was a time when we spent it in quite remote island where suprisingly, there were roasted pig, proper sumptuous meal and fireworks. And another one in a nice place with party pooper and carols and roasted turkey? Yes, turkey!

 

I remember my best Christmas Eve meal was last year, when we roasted sausages and corns on a small make shift barbeque pit. oh oh.. I had new tiny Christmas tree :p, the first 'quite' proper one.

[Carol the Dabbler]

Near as I understand it, lutefisk is dried fish that is then soaked until -- well, the polite word would be "reconstituted," but apparently a more accurate description would be "slimy."  It seems to be most popular among the older generations, who were accustomed to eating it when they were kids.  Encountering it for the first time as an adult doesn't tend to work out well.

 

But I'm certainly no expert -- I think I had a bite or two of the stuff one time, years ago.  I'm sure Camper can fill you in much more authoritatively.

[Hikari]

Traditional Christmas dinner in the US can vary depending on ethnic makeup. Growing up it was traditionally ham or lutefisk (latter only when at grandparents) along with Swedish meatballs, Swedish sausage, & pickled herrings for the meat, lefse ([think potato and flour tortilla made from scratch] buttered and sugared to taste by the person eating it), mashed potatoes, gravy, green beans, jellied cranberries, and a whole bunch of cookies (there were nearly 30 people at dinner). Nowadays it's Swedish meatballs, possibly lefse if I've made any, mashed potatoes, green beans, mint chocolate soymilk, & something for desert (I'm generally in charge of Christmas dinner if my parents host and it's around 10 at most).

 

As a rule I adore seafood, but I met my match with lutefisk.

 

It is not part of my cultural heritage (I'm German; we lean toward sausages and pickled cabbage.  The Germanic rule is: if it makes you fart copiously, we eat it.)  But quite a few years ago now I was invited to sample lutefisk at a friend's house.  Can't remember if it was for Thanksgiving or more like New Year's.  His boyfriend's people were Norwegian.

 

To be fair, he didn't try to disguise what it was.  "C'mon over and try some fish soaked in lye!'

 

Me (thinking I'd misheard):  Excuse me?  (LYE??? Isn't that poison?)

 

Well, I tried it, because I will try just about anything once, as long as it's not still moving.  The lutefisk was definitely not still moving, unless you jiggled the plate.  It lived up to its name.  Tasted just like fish-flavored soap, with the same consistency.  I am still here to tell the tale, but I will not be eating any more lutefisk in this lifetime.

[Carol the Dabbler]

To be fair, he didn't try to disguise what it was.  "C'mon over and try some fish soaked in lye!'

 

Me (thinking I'd misheard):  Excuse me?  (LYE??? Isn't that poison?)

 

If you drink it, yeah.  Moral of story:  Don't drink it.

 

I take it you've never eaten hominy or grits, then?