Speedy's Cafe - General Chat about anything you like!

[Fantasy Lover]

It looks amazing!

[Carol the Dabbler]

On 10/9/2025 at 8:08 AM, Van Buren Supernova said:

Anyway, this is Locky!

Is that what you were making with his brushed-out fur?  In any case, it's just adorable -- though not as much so as the real guy!

 

[J.P.]

Hey, that's great work!

[Fantasy Lover]

It's weird that this didn't happen yet, it should have happened at several times the last few years but it didn't happen until yesterday.

My biggest fear is to become one of those people who are found months after they died, yesterday I saw my future on tv. Old, alone, no social network, and the only company that comes was the cleaner.

And that triggered me, what was weird because a few family members had a brush of death and I've thought about my future without my relatives several times now, none of that triggered me.

It's like I didn't want to confront that thought, it was only until I saw that old man that I triggered that fear. I don't want that to be my future. So I feel my options to prevent that are: dating a mom, foster care or adoption. The first option seems the easiest one, and after I graduate and have a job I can save for a home

[Carol the Dabbler]

50 minutes ago, Fantasy Lover said:

it was only until I saw that old man that I triggered that fear. I don't want that to be my future. So I feel my options to prevent that are: dating a mom, foster care or adoption. The first option seems the easiest one, and after I graduate and have a job I can save for a home

You've already taken the first step -- simply realizing that you have some control over your own future.  Having kids is no guarantee, of course, but it's one good possibility.  Even having younger friends can be helpful, especially once you get to the age when people 20 years younger than you are adults.

It's easier to think of the internet as your community, but that's no substitute for flesh-and-blood people in your neighborhood.  I need to take that advice more often myself.

 

[Fantasy Lover]

I know that having kids is no guarantee, that's why I'm also considering foster care. You can do that until your 60's I think

[Fantasy Lover]

Having SAD sucks, I have trouble being alone again. The same thoughts that plagued me a year ago plague me again today: I feel so lonely, I have to no one to come home to and the only one who's waiting for me is my cat. I miss having people around me, I miss being able to eat at the psychiatry because groceries are expensive.

 

So I took matters in my own hand, I asked my grandparents if I can stay during next week school holiday. I'll have company and free food. it'll be a nice break from school, studying, shores, responsibilities and uncertainty/stress I have regarding my income. Because I feel like quiting school but I can't afford to quit, I know it's just my pessimism speaking. I just need some R and R and I'll feel ready for school again

[Carol the Dabbler]

1 hour ago, Fantasy Lover said:

I asked my grandparents if I can stay during next week school holiday. I'll have company and free food. it'll be a nice break from school, studying, shores, responsibilities and uncertainty/stress I have regarding my income. Because I feel like quiting school but I can't afford to quit, I know it's just my pessimism speaking. I just need some R and R and I'll feel ready for school again

Sounds like a good plan!    

 

[Fantasy Lover]

And I see this forum is a graveyard again, to go hibernate again

[besleybean]

All ducks and pussy cats please stay!

[Carol the Dabbler]

16 hours ago, Fantasy Lover said:

I see this forum is a graveyard again

Things will presumably pick up again next time VBS has internet access.  (And certain other members also tend to be sporadic.)  So don't forget to check in occasionally.

 

[besleybean]

Plus, all of the cast are so involved in other projects and we can talk about them.

[Van Buren Supernova]

Yes, they are made from his brushed-out fur… at first. For the finishing touch, especially the head, I sneaked up on him with a scissor. He needs trimming every two weeks anyway. So, I just delayed the trimming and continue to do manual thievery. He ended up with uneven look here and there and I explained to people who knows him by sending them the finished mini Locky. No animals were harmed in this project except for my pride because of his judgmental and condescending look.

Anyway, after it was finished, I had tidied up his fur. It was only a few days before I had to travel, so he is with his original grandma now, and usually when I pick him up, he is very hairy and fatter (like any grandma except mine. Story for next time, my grandma was really mean to me —> no exaggeration).

I’m on the quest of accompanying mom for her cataract surgery, to meet my spouse, and then my brothers, when we’ll go to visit my hometown, the place where I was born. I haven’t been there for 28 years, since 1997! I have to leave Locky for two months which always break my heart but at least I know he is in a good hand.

I guess I’d do anything to try to immortalize him, including painting and sketching, but I haven’t been diligent with it (just like this project).

And here, I found one of the starting picture. He didn't even want to look at it! Now I hope you understand why I gave it up for so long! I used other fur for this frame work and the rest was his. It looked like a scary lizard for a long time. This is not the worse phase though, my sil wanted to send an exorcist at one time when I sent her my progress.

Hope everyone is well.

 

[Van Buren Supernova]

On 10/15/2025 at 12:40 PM, Fantasy Lover said:

It's weird that this didn't happen yet, it should have happened at several times the last few years but it didn't happen until yesterday.

My biggest fear is to become one of those people who are found months after they died, yesterday I saw my future on tv. Old, alone, no social network, and the only company that comes was the cleaner.

And that triggered me, what was weird because a few family members had a brush of death and I've thought about my future without my relatives several times now, none of that triggered me.

It's like I didn't want to confront that thought, it was only until I saw that old man that I triggered that fear. I don't want that to be my future. So I feel my options to prevent that are: dating a mom, foster care or adoption. The first option seems the easiest one, and after I graduate and have a job I can save for a home

 

I don’t know if it makes you feel better, or worse. From what I know, having children doesn’t guarantee this wouldn’t happen and that is, imho, a wrong reason to have children, whether it’s your own or someone you take responsibility with. I have seen many parents abandoned by their children or scammed for life only to be dumped when their money ran out. To me, it’s one of the most heartbreaking things that can happen, and this happened in a traditional culture setting while family is still a big part of life and kids are expected to take care of their parents and vice versa.

It was in the news not long ago, that a banker had a hunch not to authorized a transaction because she noticed this elderly man’s reluctancy to sign on the paper to empty his bank account. His daughter stood next to him and kept saying her father had dementia and they had agreed on that and she kept answering questions on his behalf etc etc. The banker decided to write the question down and asked the man to pick the answer about whether he wanted it to happen and he kept picking no. They had a talk and her daughter was arrested because she had been stealing his money. He was of sound mind, but never reported her because… she was his daughter. Another elderly parents were locked out of their own house after being tricked to sign a paper. All those shit.

Granted, good children exist but you know what I’m trying to say.

On the other hand, not everyone is fit to be a parent, it’s a crazy responsibility and a forever commitment. I applaud those who do it well, I think they are angels on earth. I really admire them. I don’t think I am capable to take that responsible of raising another human well and that was one of my reasons not to.

I spent my youth deflecting annoying questions of people asking me why I decided not to have children and their argument was who would take care of you when you are older? I told them to piss off and stick it when the sun don’t shine which I have learned it’s not real place because I was confused why people keep asking me to store stuff there when I live around equator.

Again, not sure if it’d make you feel better or worse, I believe this is an unspoken worries of everyone. Even those with loved ones. I stayed alone and apart from my spouse for 12 years now and there were times when I thought if I died he wouldn’t know and nobody would find me for a while because I don’t have close friends here. If I was in an accident on the road, who would feed my dog and rescue him? So, I made my preparation like telling my dog’s original grandma where I hide my key in the garden and his water bowl is always filled to the brim whenever I am out etc and I try not to think about it anymore. For me, it’s not a problem if I’m gone, I don’t think I will care when it happens, as long as they are well.

My favorite saying is death and stupidity wouldn’t be felt by you, but people around you.

[Van Buren Supernova]

On 10/24/2025 at 5:00 PM, besleybean said:

All ducks and pussy cats please stay!

Oi! What about silhouettes?

[besleybean]

Oh, those too! X

[Van Buren Supernova]

I'd add alphabets as well!

[Fantasy Lover]

You mean beans, right?

[Carol the Dabbler]

20 hours ago, Fantasy Lover said:

You mean beans, right?

As in Besley beans?

 

[Fantasy Lover]

The one and only 😌

[besleybean]

I only just got that...

D'oh!

[Carol the Dabbler]

7 hours ago, besleybean said:

I only just got that...

D'oh!

Took me a while too!

[Carol the Dabbler]

On 11/4/2025 at 2:27 AM, Van Buren Supernova said:

I told them to piss off and stick it when the sun don’t shine which I have learned it’s not real place because I was confused why people keep asking me to store stuff there when I live around equator.

Oh, it's a real place alright, and just about everybody's got one!

 

[Fantasy Lover]

2 hours ago, Carol the Dabbler said:

Oh, it's a real place alright, and just about everybody's got one!

 

I thought everyone knew to which place it refers

[Artemis]

Been watching through “Sherlock” again for the first time since about 2018.  It’s been fun to revisit, also a little sad.  I miss it, and those early years.