Speedy's Cafe - General Chat about anything you like!

[Carol the Dabbler]

Saw something odd today. I went for a walk in a neighborhood where I'd never been before. It's an upscale housing development, with houses ranging from moderate size to large (and mildly ostentatious). The biggest ones have garages for four cars, and probably sell for around a million dollars.

 

What gets me is, those largest houses are mostly on the south side of the street -- meaning that immediately behind their (fairly small) back yard is a four-lane US highway -- and just beyond that are a couple of fairly busy railroad tracks.

 

Who would spend all that money to have a highway and a train track right outside their back door?

[Pseudonym]

Hm, I agree, I certainly wouldn't. If I had that kind of money I'd be out in the countryside, make myself a little compound to keep the world out and make sure I had a sea view. 

[Shadow Dweller]

@Carol: My friend was a little late, someone already uploaded the current server's winners first so she didn't get to use image hosting service to do it her own.

[Van Buren Supernova]

Hm, I agree, I certainly wouldn't. If I had that kind of money I'd be out in the countryside, make myself a little compound to keep the world out and make sure I had a sea view.

 

I like sea view, but I need to access it as well. If you put a jumping platform I would pay you good rent, one banana per day. I promise I'd learn slingshot to get all those annoying low flying crafts.

 

 

And here... for ladies who want to reduce unwanted attention, I believe I posted some hairy legging before.. and here is hairy belly.

 

 

[Pseudonym]

Ewwww. That looks like something made my Ed Gein if he was into men. 

[Van Buren Supernova]

I remember being curious reading it, so I dig it up.

 

When I fell down the stairs last year and had to go and get x-rayed I didn't put any make-up on, I figure if there is one place you can get away with looking particularly rough it's going to be the hospital.

You should see me. I use breathing as excuse for looking rough. Not joking, extremely lacking effort and skill in that department.

 

my hubby knows me so well he went home and returned with my curling iron, brush, hairspray, and makeup, among other things. I was touched that he actually knew the "I'm sick" collection of bare minimum makeup: foundation, eyeliner, and mascara, although he may have brought eye shadow for me too.

I've only seen my Mom without makeup during daylight hours a handful of times, and she would never open the door if she didn't have her hair done. When she was in ICU and sedated, I got her brush and styled her hair the way she would want it, because I knew it would make her crazy to think people had seen her otherwise.

Boton, sorry in advance if my question is uncomfortable in any way and if you don't feel like answering. I'm just curious but aware it could be misinterpreted as judgemental but I really don't mean to.

 

I have friends in the past who always wore make-up and it made me wonder that obviously beside making one feels better, is there a connection of putting up guard or something similar?

 

We did our assignment in my hostel room (uni) and a friend had to spend the night, when someone knocked on door, I had to be the one to open because she went hiding or prepared herself. I have to admit when I saw her without make up for the first time, I was surprised because she looked very different but not in a bad way. Well, beside the lack of natural eyebrows to make way for drawn ones, that was actually a bit terrifying tbh. And if, she was caught in situation where she had to be out there without her usual make-up, there was some change in her personality, like she was very self aware but in destructive way, over sensitive and trying to avoid contact.

So I wonder a lot, I know feeling and looking great is very important, but I also think being someone the way it is anytime anywhere feels very comfortable and convenient.

 

Make-up has power of enhancement of one's feature and beauty, but personally I feel more comfortable and relax around those without. I'm talking about very proper style that makes a person look very different, not light daily make-up.

To be honest, subconsciously, I think I put more guard with people with proper make-up, similar with talking with people wearing dark sunglass. I think it's the reaction of me thinking that sunglass and make-up as some kind of guard for the real person, so I'm curious if it really is.

[Pseudonym]

I know I'm less likely to make eye contact with people if I don't have makeup on so there is definitely an element of it being armour. I'd never go to work without makeup on but I'll go to the shops without a problem - I'm too lazy to bother if I'm unlikely to see anyone I know. I'd be horribly embarrassed if I did run into someone I know though.

[Boton]

I remember being curious reading it, so I dig it up.

 

 

When I fell down the stairs last year and had to go and get x-rayed I didn't put any make-up on, I figure if there is one place you can get away with looking particularly rough it's going to be the hospital.

You should see me. I use breathing as excuse for looking rough. Not joking, extremely lacking effort and skill in that department.

 

my hubby knows me so well he went home and returned with my curling iron, brush, hairspray, and makeup, among other things. I was touched that he actually knew the "I'm sick" collection of bare minimum makeup: foundation, eyeliner, and mascara, although he may have brought eye shadow for me too.

I've only seen my Mom without makeup during daylight hours a handful of times, and she would never open the door if she didn't have her hair done. When she was in ICU and sedated, I got her brush and styled her hair the way she would want it, because I knew it would make her crazy to think people had seen her otherwise.

Boton, sorry in advance if my question is uncomfortable in any way and if you don't feel like answering. I'm just curious but aware it could be misinterpreted as judgemental but I really don't mean to.

 

I have friends in the past who always wore make-up and it made me wonder that obviously beside making one feels better, is there a connection of putting up guard or something similar?

 

We did our assignment in my hostel room (uni) and a friend had to spend the night, when someone knocked on door, I had to be the one to open because she went hiding or prepared herself. I have to admit when I saw her without make up for the first time, I was surprised because she looked very different but not in a bad way. Well, beside the lack of natural eyebrows to make way for drawn ones, that was actually a bit terrifying tbh. And if, she was caught in situation where she had to be out there without her usual make-up, there was some change in her personality, like she was very self aware but in destructive way, over sensitive and trying to avoid contact.

So I wonder a lot, I know feeling and looking great is very important, but I also think being someone the way it is anytime anywhere feels very comfortable and convenient.

 

Make-up has power of enhancement of one's feature and beauty, but personally I feel more comfortable and relax around those without. I'm talking about very proper style that makes a person look very different, not light daily make-up.

To be honest, subconsciously, I think I put more guard with people with proper make-up, similar with talking with people wearing dark sunglass. I think it's the reaction of me thinking that sunglass and make-up as some kind of guard for the real person, so I'm curious if it really is.

It's a really great question, and I don't mind you asking at all! I appreciate you doing so.

 

I've asked myself the same question, because we are in a period where many women feel freer or more authentic without it. After a lot of thinking, I have to say that honestly I simply feel better and more like myself with my makeup on.

 

I remember so well the day my mom let me start wearing makeup. She took me to the drug store to pick out a little bit of cheap stuff I could wear to school, with some age-related limits. I don't think I ever went to school a day after that without my makeup on.

 

I love the process. I love picking out what I'm going to look like that day and choosing the products to make it happen. I love watching my face transform into something that is my own creation and expression. I love that my makeup tells the world, "this is how I want you to see me, and I control that image."

 

Makeup also makes me feel better. Even if I were sick at home, I would put on my makeup to make me feel more normal. In the hospital, I was partly grasping at ways to ease the terrible pain I was in, and I knew that putting on my face would make me feel better. At least I wouldn't have to look at the pale skin while my hemoglobin dropped or the dark circles from not sleeping for days.

 

There is an element, too, of respect, although this is secondary to my own comfort and enjoyment. I wear makeup in front of my husband because he deserves the best me. Yes, I *can* show him the worst, but the reality is that you see a lot of each other not at your best when you are in a long marriage. I take every chance I can get to show him my best as a way of expressing love. He has taken to doing some of that for me, too.

 

I also wanted to show the doctors and nurses respect. They had to to unspeakably unpalatable things to care for me. The least I could do to make their jobs less awful was to brush my teeth, curl my hair, and put on as much makeup as I literally could stand up long enough to do, just to show them respect for their work.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[Carol the Dabbler]

I've asked myself the same question, because we are in a period where many women feel freer or more authentic without it. After a lot of thinking, I have to say that honestly I simply feel better and more like myself with my makeup on.

I started wearing makeup in my teens (remember Tangee lipstick?), but that was just because I could, and I never did wear it routinely.  Then when I was teaching, I wore eyeliner and lipstick so the kids in the back of the room could see my facial expressions better, thinking it might help them understand what I was saying.  Once I changed careers, that was it.

 

But I do understand what you're saying, because I went through something similar regarding my legs.  There was a (mercifully brief) phase when I figured guys don't shave their legs, so why should I?  So I didn't -- until I finally had to admit to myself that I really, really didn't like the way I looked with hairy legs.

 

I also wanted to show the doctors and nurses respect. They had to to unspeakably unpalatable things to care for me. The least I could do to make their jobs less awful was to brush my teeth, curl my hair, and put on as much makeup as I literally could stand up long enough to do, just to show them respect for their work.

I would agree with you as regards tooth brushing, hair combing, and a bit of washing up, but to me, that's a whole different category from makeup.  The former things just make me look (and smell?) like a nice clean me, whereas makeup would make me look (and feel) like somebody else.

[Boton]

 

 (remember Tangee lipstick?),

 

You can still get Tangee, did you know that?

 

I missed that being a readily-available thing, but I used to love this knock-off that was this dull green in the tube. It unfailingly created a shade on my lips that was perfect for me and stayed all day with no bleed.  Boy, I miss that.  That's the only lipstick I've ever liked; everything else bleeds like crazy on me.

[Arcadia]

Huh, I'm sitting here watching PBS, and suddenly there's a program on called "The Real Sherlock Holmes." Starts out with Setlock and scenes from ASIP. Oh, and interviews with Gatiss. It's about how Holmes affected the real world, or something like that. Guess I know what I'll be watching for the next little while.

[Carol the Dabbler]

I think we may have that on DVD.  Or something like that.  Hang on....

 

Nope, apparently I was thinking of "Elementary, My Dear Watson: The Man Behind Sherlock Holmes."

 

Could you get more info on the thing you're watching -- producer, director, narrator, whatever might help pin it down amid a sea of things with similar titles?

[Artemis]

I saw that awhile back, it was pretty interesting. I've seen lots of them though, at a certain point they start to blend together, lol. Carol, I'm guessing this is the one Arcadia's talking about: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt4170732/

 

My tablet keeps trying to autocorrect "Arcadia" to "A radiator".

[Carol the Dabbler]

Looks like you're right, but I don't believe that was among the items that came up on Amazon.  Maybe it's not available on DVD (though it is, of course, available for streaming -- grrrr).

 

What's your verdict, Arcadia -- would it be worth buying if somebody does offer a DVD?

 

[Fantasy Lover]

I started wearing makeup in my teens (remember Tangee lipstick?), but that was just because I could, and I never did wear it routinely. Then when I was teaching, I wore eyeliner and lipstick so the kids in the back of the room could see my facial expressions better, thinking it might help them understand what I was saying. Once I changed careers, that was it.

I don't wear make up, for several reasons: 1. It's chemical garbage. 2. Life is too expensive already so I prefer not spent my money on it. 3. Like you said it's an armour, and I like don't like coming across as weak or vulnerable so I don't wear it. 4. I'm not going to wear it because society wants me to.

 

Okay, story time. Before I realised I was gay and started dating girls I had a row about this with my boyfriend, he then criticised the fact that I don't wear parfum and my clothing style. And I was like: I wear whatever I like, if you want a more girly girlfriend than you get a girly girlfriend not a tomboy, I'm not going to wear any of these things because YOU want me to. So I dumped his his ass, because those are serious potential abuse red flags.

[Shadow Dweller]

Is there something special about the last 2-3 days, like national holiday or the likes in the USA (except for weekend)? Because my role-play partners all were disappearing en-masses at approximately the same period.

[Pseudonym]

They aren't based in Las Vegas are they?

[Boton]

3. Like you said it's an armour, and I like don't like coming across as weak or vulnerable so I don't wear it. 4. I'm not going to wear it because society wants me to.

 

 

 

Perhaps I shouldn't keep this going, but genuinely curious.  (You don't have to answer this if you don't want.)

 

Do you look at women wearing makeup and think that they are weak and vulnerable?

 

What messages do you get from society that makes you think you are supposed to wear makeup?  I ask this because I feel like there is a lot of pressure to *not* wear makeup, and that doing so is a bit of a rebellious act.  Could be a geographical thing.

[Shadow Dweller]

They aren't based in Las Vegas are they?

 

No, they are well-away from the location of the shooting.

[Fantasy Lover]

 

3. Like you said it's an armour, and I like don't like coming across as weak or vulnerable so I don't wear it. 4. I'm not going to wear it because society wants me to.

 

 

Perhaps I shouldn't keep this going, but genuinely curious. (You don't have to answer this if you don't want.)

 

Do you look at women wearing makeup and think that they are weak and vulnerable?

 

What messages do you get from society that makes you think you are supposed to wear makeup? I ask this because I feel like there is a lot of pressure to *not* wear makeup, and that doing so is a bit of a rebellious act. Could be a geographical thing.

Well, it depends on the amount of make up. The more you wear the more you say "I have a low self esteem" in my eyes.

[Boton]

Wow, I'm in trouble then!   :D If we ever get to meet, just remember that I have a pretty darn healthy self-esteem, no matter what you may think about my makeup!

[Pseudonym]

My self-esteem is absolutely fine too just fyi. 

[Pseudonym]

Not aimed at you FL, but just as an aside:

What gets me is the assumption that makeup is worn for men. When I have to do trade shows in the summer I'm sleeping in a campervan. I'll get up, get dressed, sort out whatever bizarreness my hair has formed in the night and then put my makeup on. And my sister-in-law (who never wears makeup) always, ALWAYS, has to comment on it. A comment I remember from last year was that I was 'prettying myself up for the customers.' Really gets my goat. I don't give a flying f*ck whether the customers think they I'm pretty or not. I do however like to make an effort to look nice, and I feel more put together when I am wearing makeup. 

[Carol the Dabbler]

I think it's also a regional / subculture kinda thing. In some social circles around here, makeup seems to be expected -- mostly the upper crust and the "bottom crust" I think, with it being more optional in between. (I could be way off base there, though, since I'm not well enough acquainted with a sufficient cross section.)

 

A lot of women seem to wear makeup only when they go out, or only for special occasions. My mother used to be like that, till she was elderly enough to figure phooey on it. (She stopped wearing a bra about the same time.)

[Boton]

I think you are right, Carol.  (Carol and I are from roughly the same geographic region in the US.)  I think there is a growing expectation in the middle SES (socio-economic statuses) that make-up constitutes a kind of artifice.  The upper crust takes it as a given, along with more complicated salon services (like regular blow-outs for hair and regular manicures and pedicures), while the lower classes seem to also wear make-up more regularly.

 

I have, however, seen many facebook posts of women my age (40s) who feel particularly good about their makeup that day and post a selfie, to which the standard affirmative response is "makeup on fleek!" or "makeup on point!"