Shoot the Wall (A.K.A. The Rant Thread)

[Carol the Dabbler]

... one of them has even had surgical stomach intervention.  She's lost lots and lots of weight, too.

 

Judging by what I've seen, bariatric surgery is the next best thing to a scam.  I've known four people who've had it.  Two of them had the surgery recently, and are definitely trimmer (though nowhere near thin).  The other two had it a few years back, and have regained at least everything they lost.  What they apparently don't tell you is, if you routinely eat more than a modest amount, your new smaller stomach will gradually stretch back out to its original size.  And you'll be even worse off than you were, because your stomach walls will be thinner (thus more susceptible to damage), and you'll still be missing whatever digestive juices had been supplied by the part of your old stomach that was blocked off.  You'd be better off just wearing your belt a couple of notches too tight.

 

My best friend is naturally very thin .... she tried to stuff herself with food that didn't agree with her, and all for what?

At one point, my (first) husband and my (former) boss were both hugely on my case about being too thin, so I put myself on a weight-gaining regimen (extra calories in everything), and ended up with stomach cramps so bad that I lost ten pounds.

 

Strangely enough, we have the same cup size. (She's gorgeous, I can tell you ;) )

 

You needn't envy her -- no shoulder fat to pad the bra straps, with all that weight on them (which can lead to back problems as well).

[by the sea]

Trying not to be judgmental  but not succeeding  , I tend to think that surgical measures for weight loss are cheating.  Maybe because I grew up in an environment where accepting responsibility for your actions was the ultimate achievement ... I still tend to think that you get fat because you eat too much and the only way to lose weight is to actively work at it.  Logically, I understand that there are many reasons for obesity and whatever works for someone to reverse that situation should be acceptable, as long as it doesn't ruin your health in other ways.  But years of training make it hard for me to really go along with that ... I say hard but not impossible.  Maybe I'm getting mellow at long last.  In any event, I'm currently overweight, know what I have to do to change that and just need to get my head where it needs to go.  Sounds easy, doesn't it ?  

 

Debbie

[Arcadia]

Hardest thing in the world, imo. Otherwise we'd all be doing it. ;)

[T.o.b.y]

 

... one of them has even had surgical stomach intervention.  She's lost lots and lots of weight, too.

 

Judging by what I've seen, bariatric surgery is the next best thing to a scam.  I've known four people who've had it.  Two of them had the surgery recently, and are definitely trimmer (though nowhere near thin).  The other two had it a few years back, and have regained at least everything they lost.  What they apparently don't tell you is, if you routinely eat more than a modest amount, your new smaller stomach will gradually stretch back out to its original size.  And you'll be even worse off than you were, because your stomach walls will be thinner (thus more susceptible to damage), and you'll still be missing whatever digestive juices had been supplied by the part of your old stomach that was blocked off.  You'd be better off just wearing your belt a couple of notches too tight.

 

From all I know, bariatric surgery can work very well, but the problem is the patient still has to do a lot for her- or himself. It can't make people loose weight, it can only help them loose weight. I met a woman once who was outraged because her health insurance refused to pay for that kind of procedure for her. She drank three liters of Sprite a day. The real kind, the kind that has actual sugar in it. I tried, very gently and politely, to explain to her that as long as she did that, there really wasn't much point in getting the operation, because liquid calories will trickle through anything and she'll still never feel saturated. The plan would have been to wean her from the Sprite and get her to take part in a program so she could prove to her insurance company that she really was trying to loose weight and conservative measures weren't enough. But she said she couldn't change anything about her life, and she wouldn't. She just wanted the surgeon to make her thin. Well... That's okay, only in that case, if she had gotten the surgery, I don't think it would have been fair for her to blame the doctor for her lack of success.

 

Trying not to be judgmental  but not succeeding  , I tend to think that surgical measures for weight loss are cheating.  Maybe because I grew up in an environment where accepting responsibility for your actions was the ultimate achievement ... I still tend to think that you get fat because you eat too much and the only way to lose weight is to actively work at it.  Logically, I understand that there are many reasons for obesity and whatever works for someone to reverse that situation should be acceptable, as long as it doesn't ruin your health in other ways.  But years of training make it hard for me to really go along with that ... I say hard but not impossible.  Maybe I'm getting mellow at long last.  In any event, I'm currently overweight, know what I have to do to change that and just need to get my head where it needs to go.  Sounds easy, doesn't it ?

 

Yeah, it sounds easy, but it's not. Because we aren't half as much in charge of our behavior as we think, not when it comes to primal matters like eating and drinking. There are forces at work in our brains and our endocrine systems that are way too strong for most people's so-called free will.

 

It's a dangerous illusion that with the unlimited food supplies we have at hand, we can really control how much and when and what we eat. The only people who can truly do that are called anorexic and qualify as seriously ill.

 

I'm not saying it's impossible to practice some kind of self-control (hey, I'm a Sherlock fan - all in favor of mind over matter and all that). But I know, from professional and personal experience, that for some people it can be terribly, tortuously, impossibly hard. And that is not their fault. Of course it's not helpful to tell them to just give up 'cause they don't stand a chance or something like that. Everybody has a chance. But I think it's only fair to acknowledge that the odds are often spectacularly against you, and to respect the effort some make day in and day out fighting a loosing battle.

 

In my limited experience, it is often more helpful to focus on dos than donts. Do eat fresh food. Do exercise. Do tell people to shut the F*** up about your figure and mind their own bloody business, because feeling bad about yourself promotes depression, and depression worsens obesity.

 

There. That was my rant for today.

[Bendydoodle Cantaloupe]

I can't rant much today, other than the fact that I am tired of the world and ready to kill a man.

[Carol the Dabbler]

... I still tend to think that you get fat because you eat too much and the only way to lose weight is to actively work at it....

Having rarely achieved even "normal" weight, I shouldn't be talking -- but I will anyhow. Yes, people get fat because they're eating too much -- all things being equal. But I've recently noticed my metabolism slowing down, meaning that the amount of food I could tuck away ten years ago would -- well, I'd never want to eat that much now, it would turn my stomach, but if I forced myself to, I'd be way overweight. As it was, I was merely getting kinda squishy around the middle, and my clothes didn't fit. The answer in my case seems to be a] don't forget to stay active (e.g., walk a couple of miles a day), and b] take a couple capsules of turmeric concentrate a day (which boosts my energy level and also helps me sleep).

 

From all I know, bariatric surgery can work very well, but the problem is the patient still has to do a lot for her- or himself. It can't make people loose weight, it can only help them loose weight. I met a woman once who was outraged because her health insurance refused to pay for that kind of procedure for her. She drank three liters of Sprite a day. The real kind, the kind that has actual sugar in it.... But she said she couldn't change anything about her life, and she wouldn't. She just wanted the surgeon to make her thin....

 

She sounds like a better candidate for liposuction -- every few years for the rest of her life.  :(

 

I can't rant much today, other than the fact that I am tired of the world and ready to kill a man.

You really can't just say that much and then leave us hanging, you know! 

 

[T.o.b.y]

I can't rant much today, other than the fact that I am tired of the world and ready to kill a man.

 

Oh, no, no, no, you're not and you don't!

 

You sound as if you might want to eat some chocolate and listen to a good song.

 

Here, this is me trying to cheer you up:

 

Don't tell me this image doesn't make you smile at least a teeny little bit...?

[Shadow Dweller]

Like T.o.b.y said. Physical exercise usually also can shed some of that all-consuming anger and allow us to see the problem from a different point off view (and its possible solutions).

[Bendydoodle Cantaloupe]

 

I can't rant much today, other than the fact that I am tired of the world and ready to kill a man.

You really can't just say that much and then leave us hanging, you know! 

 

 

Well, I did get groped for the first time today. Actual groping. From a girl.

 

the paranoia in me says it's because i'm too attractive, but i didn't do anything, it just happened....

[T.o.b.y]

 

Well, I did get groped for the first time today. Actual groping. From a girl.

 

A girl? Well, that's an unusual twist... So, what did you do then? Give her a good push?

 

[Bendydoodle Cantaloupe]

I was too scared to make a scene, actually... but the next time it happens I'll probably strangle her.

[T.o.b.y]

Is this the newest trend in misguided feminism, then? After "we can be just as violent as men" now it's "we can do sexual harassment too"?

[Bendydoodle Cantaloupe]

Tch, I have a reputation of sorts that includes (but is not limited to) summoning the devil and/or killing people. Mostly because I have a knack for being morbidly funny, but there's a grain of truth in every exaggeration. Next time that bitch touches me, she's going to have her throat ripped open.

[Shadow Dweller]

Tch, I have a reputation of sorts that includes (but is not limited to) summoning the devil and/or killing people. Mostly because I have a knack for being morbidly funny, but there's a grain of truth in every exaggeration. Next time that bitch touches me, she's going to have her throat ripped open.

Don't let there's evidence that it was you :p Joking aside, teach her that it is 'ask before touch' without incriminating yourself.

[Bendydoodle Cantaloupe]

"It wasn't me, it was this other weird black-haired Asian girl..." :lol:

[Shadow Dweller]

"It wasn't me, it was this other weird black-haired Asian girl..." :lol:

 

Don't let things ever come to that, nothing whatsoever to connect you with a misfortune that happened to that girl  :P  Get other people to do it. 

 

[Bendydoodle Cantaloupe]

Duck under her bus seat and set her pants on fire! :D

[Shadow Dweller]

Duck under her bus seat and set her pants on fire! :D

 

You're really too kind for your own good. :p

[T.o.b.y]

Could somebody please tell my legs to behave? They feel as if the bones have suddenly turned to jelly. I tried to exercise for half an hour tonight and it just wouldn't get better. Out of breath, too, and feeling sort of empty and fuzzy and altogether very weak. What the heck is going on? Body? Is this what growing old feels like? If so, I will have to rethink my "I am not afraid of aging" attitude. Somebody make this stop. I have to go to work soon.

[Bakerstreet Irregular]

Either you are coming down with something.....or maybe need a check up?  Be safe and take care.

[T.o.b.y]

Awww, thanks... I have no idea what direction this is going in, but I just managed to smear mascara in my eyes and they are burning like fire. This night is off to a bad start for sure. All I can hope is that it will be better once I get to work and forget about my stupid self for a while.

[Carol the Dabbler]

Could be an allergic reaction -- to just about anything.  Try to keep your life as simple as possible for a while (e.g., maybe no mascara) and see if that helps.  Also, if you've recently made any changes, those would be the prime suspects -- though (as I'm sure you know) a person can become allergic to something they've been fine with for years.

 

Take it as easy as possible till you feel better.  And keep us posted, please.

 

Added:  Do you have a carbon-monoxide monitor in your home?

 

[T.o.b.y]

Awww, really, you're all so sweet...

 

No, I don't have a CO monitor, but then I have nothing that could emit CO, and the guy who checks the fire alarms and heating and all that stuff was just here last week. I also don't think it's an allergic reaction, and I have no signs of infection.

 

Actually, I feel anaemic. I felt the exact same way back when I donated blood regularly and didn't take the iron supplements.

 

Or it's nothing at all and just me being neurotic and nursing a psychosomatic disorder. I was almost fine at work. The legs still feel weak, but I can walk perfectly well. Work is always good for me. No wonder I'm in love with Sherlock: At home I am a whiny slob with a thousand nervous ticks and quirks, at work I am a focused, efficient, tidy, mature adult.

[sittything]

OK, people.  This is mostly foul mood induced, but I'm putting it out here so maybe it'll increase my odds of follow through.  I have been massively underachieving professionally for the last 7 years.  It's totally my own fault, but basically I'm overeducated and underemployed, but I took this job because I needed the paycheck.  Time to get my act together this year, though, because my job is really dragging me down emotionally and motivation-wise.  Thanks for reading my whine.  lol

[T.o.b.y]

OK, people.  This is mostly foul mood induced, but I'm putting it out here so maybe it'll increase my odds of follow through.  I have been massively underachieving professionally for the last 7 years.  It's totally my own fault, but basically I'm overeducated and underemployed, but I took this job because I needed the paycheck.  Time to get my act together this year, though, because my job is really dragging me down emotionally and motivation-wise.  Thanks for reading my whine.  lol

 

No, that's not a whine, that sounds like a serious problem, and I sympathize deeply. I keep complaining that my job demands about twice as much of me as I can give, but I have a feeling the opposite must be worse. And as for the situation being "your own fault" - what would the alternative have been? Very few people can afford to sit around and twiddle their thumbs until the perfect offer shows up. Needing the paycheck is a perfectly valid reason to take a shoddy job.

 

So, any plans? Options?

 

I do hope you find a way out, and until then: feel free to vent your frustration as much as you like.